People get wrong. The power of this platform lies in its decentralized nature. If you ignore the purpose of instances and look at it as part of the address to reach a handle, you will only see the messiness.

Adapt to the decentralized nature, and find the community, represented by the instance, that you most resonate with. And stick with it. Make it your home first, and know the nearest neighbours. Once and only when you have done that, visit the surrounding communities.